I will always want you
by Gleeknationn
Summary: Santana and Rachel love each other, but what happens when one f Rachel's Dad's die? Will it drive them apart? Or will they end up closer than ever? Pezberry.
1. Chapter 1

"Where is Rachel?" asked Mercedes when Rachel didn't show up for glee club.

"She's not in school today, she's gone to visit her Dad in the hospital" explained Santana.

Santana became very familiar with the families situation. Rachel's Dad LeRoy was very ill. He was in and out of hospital every couple of days due to kidney failure. Rachel was so stressed, everytime she was at Santana's house, they'd just lie and cuddle while Rachel would cry her eyes out.

"How is her Dad? Is there any news on a kidney yet?" Kurt explained

Santana shook her head and took her seat. She'd leave Rachel to explain if she wanted to.

"Well at least she has you." Finn stated

Santana gave him a friendly smile: "thanks Finn" At that point Mr Schuster walked in and clapped his hands. He spotted the empty seat next to Santana and shot her a look of understanding.

Rachel's POV

Rachel sat with her Dad LeRoy whilst he was at dialysis. It was 10 hours a day, every second day and Rachel decided to accompany him today.

"So my star, is there a reason you wanted to come with me today? And before you say anything, I could have called your Daddy to pick me up, so don't even dare say it was for a ride..." Rachel sighed as she realised the fragile, and weakened man sitting on the chair knew her so well.

"Dad I... I'm a lesbian. I'm in love with a girl and her name is Santana." Rachel revealed in one breath.

LeRoy smiled a weak, and tired smile "Rachel honey, I always knew that."  
Rachel shot him a puzzled look, expecting him to explain more:  
"Angel, when you were 7 years old, I asked you if there were any boys at school you liked, and you said 'no dad, but there is this girl and she's so pretty and funny and she makes me feel happy' I knew then"

Rachel could see her beloved Dad was getting weaker. She could see it in his walk, his smile... his eyes. It terrified her to think about how her Dad might soon be gone. The drive home was silent as LeRoy fell asleep in the car. Rachel smiled at the soft snores he was making.

Santana POV  
"Mama, Rachel's coming over. She's had a rough day, she's been at the hospital with her Dad"

Santana's family loved Rachel, and were more than happy for her to come over for a break. Her Mama made a special vegan soup for her since she suspected Rachel hadn't been eating properly.

"Santana you need to take good care of that girl. She's fragile and she needs you."

"I know Mama, I will take good care of her."

When Rachel arrived they ate the soup that Santana's Mama prepared and then they headed up to Santana's room.

"How's your dad babe?" Santana asked as she cuddled Rachel protectively and kissed the top of her head. Rachel was silent for a long time and Santana wondered if she fell asleep.

"He's very weak San" Rachel whispered "the doctors don't know how much longer he can go without a kidney and my Daddy isn't compatible. I wish they'd let me be tested maybe I-"

"Baby you know why they won't let you. A woman with one kidney is at a lesser chance of having a baby." Santana stroked Rachel's hair, repeatedly curling the same piece of hair behind her ear. Her sadness made her crawl up in a ball and Santana could only pull her closer. They remained that way for a long time until Rachel broke the silence:

"I love you San. I can't imagine what I'd do without you"

"I love you too! And don't even try to imagine life without me because I'm not going anywhere, I'll be here for as long as you want me."

"I'll always want you. Forever."

"Same here baby, are you tired? Go to sleep, I'll just be downstairs."

"No. Stay here with me please. I feel better in your arms"

"I'm not going anywhere" Santana promised and kissed her girlfriend softly on the lips.

2 hours later  
*Rachel's phone rings*

"Hello? Daddy? I'm sorry I'm late I fell asleep I'll be home- what? Daddy calm down where are you?"

"No!" Rachel cried

Santana shot upright and took her crying girlfriend into her arms: "Rach? Rachel babe talk to me?!"

"It's my Dad... He's been rushed into hospital."

"I'll drive you there"...

I know this chapter isn't long, but I know where this stories going in the next few chapters. Review please :-)


	2. Chapter 2

Santana POV  
They arrived at the hospital 20 minutes later, Santana had to drive through a few red lights to get there so fast. Rachel was silent the whole ride, curled up in a ball, eyes puffy from crying. It was 12.30 at night but Santana didn't care as tomorrow was the last day of term before the holidays. Regionals were over, they won - but Rachel could hardly focus on that right now.

They arrived at the hospital to be met by Rachel's Dad Hiram and her Mom Shelby (Rachel and Shelby had became close recently) and they both had worrying looks on there faces:

"Daddy? Is he okay? Like this is just-"

"Rachel, he's uh... He's dying. He's got hours left. You should probably say your goodbyes" Shelby said

Rachel's face was pale white. She was shaking and just nodded slowly. As she made way towards the door that was entry to the room:

"Santana, please will you come in with me? I need you with me, I can't do this without you."

Santana was dumbfounded, but she agreed anyway. Unable to say no to the girl she loved and followed Rachel into the room.

LeRoy was yellow, his body completely shutting down. Rachel gasped and squeezed Santana's hand harder. Santana then led her over to her Father and Rachel squeezed his hand. His eyes flickered open and he indicated for Rachel to take off his mask.

"Honey? Is this the girl?"

"Yes Dad, this is Santana. I brought her in here I hope you don't mind. I love you."

LeRoy smiled weakly, his lips pale ad chapped, he squeezed his brave daughters hand who was fighting the tears that threatened to pour:

"I love you to my star. You're going to be amazing. And your first broadway show, I want you to think of me. And I'll be there, in spirit. Watching. I'll be so proud. And you-" he breathlessly signalled to Santana "take care of my daughter, look after her. Make her happy."

Santana swallowed hard, chasing away any sign of tears. "I will Mr Berry, I promise."

Santana left the room when Hiram returned and promised not to leave the hospital. She sat with Shelby in the family room, just waiting for news.

Rachel POV  
Minutes and hours passed as I watched the life drain out of my beloved dad.

Daddy and I held each other as Dad's heart monitor went flat. I looked over at the defeated body lying on the bed in front of me, a contented look on his face. Free from pain and in a better place. I placed a loving kiss on his forehead and went out to the family room. Shelby and Santana both woke up from their sleep:

"It's over. He's gone!" I fell to the floor as Shelby and Santana rushed over to me. Shelby crushed me tight to her chest as Santana squeezed my hand. They were both crying also. Soothing me. Telling me it's going to be okay. But I couldn't see how, my Dad was dead. He was never coming back. He could never give me a hug when I was upset or give me opinion on my singing.

Shelby took me home 2 hour later, Santana had to leave because her Mom was getting worried.

"I'll call you later, I love you baby okay?" Santana hugged me tightly

"Okay, I love you too." I took her cheek into my hand and kissed her passionately. My lips covered in salty tears.

She left me at home as she had to go collect Beth from Quinn's. I curled up on the couch and fell into an exhausted, dreamless sleep.

I know this is kinda slow starting, but I promise it's gonna get better. Please review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys, I'm really thankful for all the reviews on this story. This chapter we see the beginning of Rachel's nasty side... **

"We are here today to celebrate the life of LeRoy Berry, a loving son, husband, father & friend."

Rachel squeezed Santana's hand that was resting on her shoulder from behind.

"LeRoy had been very sick and he's now at piece from his illness an in a better place."

Shelby went up to say a few words:

"When I first met LeRoy he said to me 'me and you would make an unbelievably beautiful baby' and we did. Rachel. He and Hiram done a wonderful job of bringing Rachel up. And she's such an amazing person."

A few tears escaped Shelby's eyes as she looked at Rachel

"I'm incredibly ashamed of the years we spent apart. But the year that I got to know him and he was the kindest, funniest and most caring person I ever had the pleasure of knowing."

They finished off the ceremony with a few of Leroy's favourite songs and his coffin being sent away to be cremated. They hugged all there friends and family and Hiram left to take off for India. He was away to stay in India with family for a couple months.

"Bye baby, behave yourself. Don't have too many parties."

"Thanks Daddy, I won't. And I have Shelby and Santana here to make me behave."

"Okay, I love you sweetie."

"I love you too Daddy, have fun in India."

Santana drove Rachel home and ordered food.

"Are you okay baby?"

"Yeah I'm okay. San sweetie, will you stay here with me tonight? I don't wanna be alone."

"Of course I'll stay here Rach. I'll stay here as long as you want me too."

Santana smiled and took tenderly kissed Rachel's forehead. Rachel then kissed Santana's lips and ran her hands through her hair. They fell onto the couch, Santana on top of Rachel. Rachel wrapped her leg around Santana and Santana started placing kissing Rachel's neck, nibbling, biting, sucking her neck. She moved her head down to the top of her chest that was showing over her dress.

"Mmm" Rachel moaned: "I want you."

That made Santana stop, and look Rachel in the eyes:

"Baby, I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage. You're upset. It's been an emotional day."

"Please San? I want this."

Santana nodded her head and leaned down to kiss Rachel. They both got stripped down to their underwear when Santana stopped again:

"Santana what is it? Rachel asked annoyed

"I'm not doing this... Not now. It doesn't feel right." Santana untangled herself from Rachel and put her clothes back on.

"You are ridiculous. Isn't that what you wanted? Fucking hell! I'm letting you have sex with me!" Rachel exploded

"What do you think I am?! Rachel I love you that's why I want to make it special for you!" Santana said

"OH COME ON SANTANA! SEX IS WHAT YOU DO!" Rachel stopped "Santana I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

"I don't give a fuck. If that's what you think..."

Santana stormed out the door and made her way home, managing to fight the tears until she was in the safety of her bedroom.

review please :p


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi guys, sorry for the delay this was meant to go up last night but life got in the way...**

**can I just say? rip Cory Monteith. A celebrity dying has never upset me more than his. #prayforLea**

**just also... I don't own glee - wish I did, but I don't.**

"WHY DID SHE SAY THOSE THINGS TO ME?!" Santana cried into her pillow "I LOVE HER AND SHE DONE THIS TO ME!" Santana continued on like that for a couple hours until she fell asleep.

_She saw Rachel standing on the football field smiling and waving at her. She was beautiful, wearing a pair of black skinny jeans and a white tank top. As she was coming towards her Santana held her arms out, expecting her girlfriend to walk straight into them but instead she walks straight past her and into the arms of a waiting Finn Hudson._

_"Rachel? What the hell are you doing?" Santana glared at Finn who was kissing Rachel's head, her cheeks, her neck._

_"You had your chance Santana. Now I'm with someone who can really love me."_

Santana woke up in a cold sweat. She looked at her phone, it told he that it was 4 o'clock in the morning - and that she had 3 new voicemails from Rachel.

_"Santana, I'm sorry baby. It's been a long day and I didn't mean anything I said. Just call me back. I love you..."_

She deleted that message and moved onto the next one...

_"San. Look I understand you're mad at me but PLEASE call me back, I'm worried about you."_

"Don't beg Rachel, it's not attractive honey..." She says as she deleted that message

The next one was sent an hour ago:

_"Sanny sweetie" Rachel was crying. She sounded drunk "I'm sorry, so, so sorry. I- I didn't mean it, you were only... looking out for me." Rachel cried even harder "you can't leave me too..."_

Then the phone cut off. She couldn't face Rachel at the moment, but hated the idea that she was upset, vulnerable and alone. Also anything could have happened to her. She wrote her Mama a note saying where she was and drove to Rachel's house. She was only wearing sweats and let herself into Rachel's house using the key that was hidden under the plant pot.

Rachel was passed out on the couch drunk, an empty bottle of vodka sitting on the table in front of her. She walked over and knelt down in front of Rachel and stroked her hair. Placing a kiss to her temple and wrapping her in a blanket. Santana settled herself on the chair and watched Rachel until she woke up.

"Oh my god" Rachel said, she held her head as it was throbbing and felt dizzy.

"Take that aspirin. It'll help..." Santana said, passing her the aspirin she's fetched.

"Oh Sanny!" Rachel said throwing herself onto Santana and pulling her in a hug "I'm so sorry! I was a cow! I don't know what I was thinking!" Rachel cried

"Rachel, take the aspirin, then we'll talk." Santana said, guiding Rachel back to the couch and handing her the aspirin again.

Rachel nodded in agreement and swallowed the cloudy water. She sat there for about 10 minutes. Head in her hands as she waited for the aspirin to kick in.

"Why did you say those things Rach?" Santana asked. Hurt evident in her eyes. "It hurt Rach. So much."

"I know. I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me."

"Look I get it that you're hurting Rachel, but I am not your punching bag that you can take everything out on." Santana said, choking back tears.

"I just wanted to feel loved... Ever since my Dad died I've never felt so alone."

"But you know I love you Rachel! I put EVERYTHING on the line for you!" Santana was crying now, tears running down her face.

"I know and I love you too! But my dad has just died! You have no idea how much that hurts!"

"I was there Rachel when he died! I held you while you fell to the floor!" Santana cried "and don't you dare say I don't know what it's like to lose someone..." she warned.

"Please don't leave me..." Rachel sobbed

That made Santana stop and walk over to the couch. She knelt down I front of Rachel and grabbed her hand in her own:

"We've had an arguement... I'm not going to break up with you for that. But you need to talk to me babe okay? From now if you're feeling down, instead of trying to seduce me, just tell me your feelings." Santana said, gaining a giggle from Rachel.

"And I did mean it y'know, what I said to your Dad. I will make you happy, and I'll always be here. For as long as you want me..." Rachel and Santana kisses, a gentle and loving kiss.

"Look at the state of us..." Rachel said stating the obvious. "What do you want to do today?"

Santana thought for a moment. "You're staying at my house tonight... I don't care what you say... But TODAY well... We could go see Shelby and Beth? However, I'll need to go home and change first."

"Yeah ok that'll be nice, and you look amazing sweetie."

"Yeah but compared to your Mom who is always so glamourous."

"Yeah I suppose."

2 hours later...

"Aw come on Beth you cheated! You looked while I was hiding!"

"I didn't Tana. I pwomise..."

"Yeah okay squirt..." Santana and Beth walked over to Rachel and Shelby who were laughing at them.

"Thanks for yeno, telling me you two were together..." Shelby said with a wink.

Santana blushed while Rachel stared down at her hands: "I was going to tell you eventually, but things got in the way... Then I thought I'd lost last night after I was a pure bitch to her but luckily she forgave me and we're stronger than ever now." Santana and Shelby both laughed.

"Well I'm happy for you. Both of you, but uh Rachel there was something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Really? What was it?"

"Well, Hiram is going to be in India for a few months and I'd feel really uncomfortable for you to be living in that big house yourself. So, I was wondering if you wanted to move in here? With me and Beth?"

Santana felt like she was in the way so took Beth through to her bedroom and played with her to let then talk.

"Mom, I really appreciate everything you're doing for me, and I love how close we are now. But I want to stay at my house, it makes me feel closer to Dad..."

"I understand sweetie, but please know there's always a room for you here."

Rachel smiled and helped Shelby prepare lunch. Later on that night Rachel and Santana had a quiet movie night and an early bed.

"I love you Santana."

"I love you too Rachel."

**_I'd appreciate it if you his reviewed, I'll be busy over the weekend so te next update will be Sunday_****_night or monday - please review! _**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi guys, I'm not really that happy with this chapter. But anyhoo here it is. thank you guys for all the reviews, they mean a lot :')**

_Party my house. I hate u if u can't make it... - Puck_

Rachel and Santana's phones both went off at the same time. They'd been tidying up the living room after the mess they'd made. Santana had practically moved into Rachel's house not wanting to leave her on her own. It had been a week since there arguement and there hadn't been any more said about it. Rachel was hardly eating though, she'd lost lots of weight, Shelby and Santana had both voiced there concerns to each other...

"Are we going to Puck's party? Please say we are! I want to have fun!"

Santana could only laugh at Rachel's enthusiasm, she nodded her head at Rachel:

"Do you seriously think I'd miss a Puckerman party? Come on Rach..."

"Yay!" Rachel clapped her hands and screeched, reaching up and kissing her girlfriend. "What can we do today though?"

"I don't know... What do you wanna do?"

"I'm really tired, I was actually wondering if I could go back to bed for a couple of hours?" The bags under Rachel's eyes showed that she was under-rested and Santana instantly took her girlfriend in her arms.

"You don't have to ask sweetie. You go back to bed and I'll go do some shopping, we're running low on food."

"Okay, thank you. Just take money from my bank if you need to..."

A full day passed, Santana had done the shopping, and went to visit her parents all whilst Rachel was catching up on her sleep. They were ready for 10 o'clock and decided to walk to Puck's house since it wasn't far (all of Lima's Jewish residents somehow lived close to each other).

"Heeeey!" Puck gave then both a slobbery kiss on the cheek. "Hey everyone! The lesbo's are here!"

Rachel and Santana both got greeted by the glee club, since they hadn't seen Rachel since before her Father's passing.

"Hey Rach! It's so good to see you again." A perfectly sober Finn greeted Rachel, Santana had gone off to get them a drink.

"Hey Finn! Thanks it's nice to see you too." The two remained friends and it was Finn who helped set Rachel and Santana up. "You're usually the first one drunk at parties" they both laughed as Finn dangled his car keys in his hands:

"Designated driver I'm afraid. So how are you?" Santana arrived back with drinks for Rachel as she slugged then back quickly, wanting to be drunk.

"I'm okay. I've got people who care around me." Rachel said squeezing Santana who was hugging her from behind.

"That's good, I'm glad. I'm here if you ever need a chat."

After, 5 vodka and lemonades, 3 beers and many shots taken off numerous people's chest, Rachel was drunk. Santana wasn't far behind her.

They both staggered home, holding hands and singing show tunes, it took them 40 minutes for a usually 10 minute walk. When they got in they weren't tired. So decided to stay up and cuddle.

"It was nice seeing all the glee club again. I forgot how nice they all were. They were so nice to me." Rachel said

"Of course they are! And they would never even dare be anything but nice, otherwise I'd release snixx on there asses."

Rachel and Santana both laughed: "it's nice to see you laugh. I've missed it." Santana commented, kissing Rachel's head.

"I know, but now I'm going to get back to myself back on track. Back to the old Rachel Barbra Berry. My Dad would be ashamed of me moping around, not eating properly." Rachel stopped as she felt Santana stiffen beneath her "did I say something to upset you?"

"No but, I don't understand why you weren't eating."

"Santana..." Rachel sat up "I wasn't eating because I felt like there was no point. I was so swallowed up on my own grief that I forgot about everyone else - even you. I'm sorry."

Santana chocked back tears, the girl she loved had been hurting all this time and Santana missed it. She believed the brave face that Rachel was putting on and going along with it.

"Santana? Don't cry baby. Please don't cry." Rachel grabbed Santana and held her while she cried. "What's up baby?"

"You've been hurting all this time and I didn't even realise. I'm such a bad person, I suck so badly."

Santana had always been a soppy drunk but Rachel had never seen her like this before.

"And when you weren't eating I just assumed you'd eat when you were hungry. Not because you we're forcing yourself not to. I'm such a shit fucking girlfriend." Santana soaked Rachel's dress with her tears then got up and ran away. Rachel couldn't keep up with her and returned back inside, leaving the door open for when she came back.

3 hours later and Rachel had fallen asleep but got woken up by Quinn and Puck shaking her.

"What the fuck is going on?" Rachel rubbed her eyes and realised that Quinn had been crying and Puck was on the verge. "What's happened?"

"Rachel, Santana and Finn have been in a car accident. You need to go to the hospital."

Rachel froze. That last sentence all too familiar. As she let herself be taken to the hospital...


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the cliffhanger last chapter guys but it had to be done! I still don't own glee btw :-)**

"Santana's condition is stable. We've managed to stop the internal bleeding and we've given her lots of pain medication. She should make a full recovery." The doctor told them.

"And Finn? Please tell me he's okay." Puck pleaded

"I'm sorry. Mr Hudson passed away in the ambulance on the way here. I'm so sorry."

"THIS ISN'T RIGHT! FINN STAYED SOBER SO THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN!" Rachel screamed

Rachel collapsed into Quinn's arms and Puck was shaking, sure Rachel was glad Santana's alive and she'll be okay. But Finn was dead. Her first love. The first person in that school to give her a chance. Rachel cried harder and harder with Quinn doing the same. When Finn's Mom arrived, she explained to her what happened. And how he was completely sober, then watched Burt Hummel as he held his wife who collapsed into his arms. Rachel felt as though she was invading there privacy so went to Santana's room.

"Rachel, what happened? I thought Santana was supposed to be staying at your house?" Maribel Lopez asked Rachel as she entered the hospital room.

"She was Mrs Lopez. We came home from the party and we started talking and she got upset and ran away. I tried to run after her but... She's too fast for me." Rachel sobbed as Mrs Lopez comforted her.

Santana lay on the hospital bed, a heart monitor to her left, and a bag of blood, attached to an IV on her right. She had many cuts and bruises on her face, but still looked beautiful. Rachel took Santana's hand and kissed her forehead. Tears staining her face. Santana was dozing in and out of consciousness, each time she woke up, with a whimper of pain.

"I'm so sorry this happened Maribel. I don't even know why she was in Finn's car!"

"I guess we'll find out when she wakes up. Is the boy Finn okay?"

Rachel let the tears fall as she stood over Santana unable to speak, instead shaking her head 'no' and running out the room.

Rachel ran to the nearest restroom and ran into one of the stalls, locking the door behind her, and vomiting the little food she had in her stomach. She felt so helpless, like she felt when her Dad had died. She looked at her watch, the time was 7.01am. She's been here for hours already. When she walked out of the restroom she was met by an unexpected face:

"Rachel? Quinn called me and told me what happened, I rushed straight over here." Shelby said wrapping Rachel in a bear hug

"Mommy, why is Ray sad?" A small voice asked Shelby. Rachel recognised the baby blonde's voice and escaped her Mothers grasp to scoop the blonde into her arms.

"I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean to cry. Just 'Tana's not very well and I'm worried."

"Is she going to be okay?"

"Why don't you ask her for yourself?" Came the familiar voice of Dr Lopez "she's awake, and she's asking for you Rachel."

Santana was sat up in bed. Her black hair spread out around her pillow, she smiled as her beautiful girlfriend walked into the room.

"Hey gorgeous." Santana greeted her girlfriend. Rachel had been crying. Still wearing her party dress from last night. She looked tired, as she made her way over to kiss her.

"Oh baby, I'm so glad you're okay. You scared me so bad d'you know that?" Rachel cried as she kissed Santana's lips, her cheek, her arms, and her hands.

"Is Finn okay?"

It was Santana's turn to cry. Rachel's long silence answered her question, that no - Finn wasn't okay.

"He didn't make it. He died in the ambulance."

"Oh my god no! Why Finn?!" Santana screamed. Rachel failing to soothe her "we only went a drive! We were talking! I was upset! Then Finn swerved to avoid this guy on a motorbike who was coming towards us and..." Santana screamed as the painful memory was too much, she had to be sedated to calm her down.

Shelby took Rachel back to her house an hour later. Not wanting to leave her on her own. After going for a shower, Rachel curled up in Shelby's bed, next to Beth who was having a nap. Shelby poked her head round the door to make sure they were both okay. She smiled. Rachel and Beth were lying facing each other, foreheads touching. With Beth's small baby hand resting on Rachel's face - presumably to wipe the tears Rachel had shed earlier.

As Shelby returned to her kitchen, she sat on her floor, with her knees up under her chin, as she realised all the precious time she missed out with Rachel. And how much her baby was hurting.

**I'm not sure whether I should add more Shelby or less Shelby, let me know what yous think!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Guys I'm sorry this took so long to update, it was my birthday and then there was this ANNOYING family thing... So this is it here now, thank you for all your reviews and follows/favourites. They make me happy:-)**

I couldn't open my eyes. I was dizzy, and felt as if I was floating. I tried to open my mouth to speak but I couldn't. My mouth was dry and my tongue felt swollen in my mouth. It was impossible to speak. Someone held a straw up to my mouth and I sucked greedily, the water felt so good as it made its way down my rough throat. I recognised the perfume the person was wearing, it smelled sweet and warming.

"Abuela?" A soothing hand caressed my forehead and I leaned into the passionate gesture

"Santana, you had to be sedated. You were too upset."

Santana's eyes then flew open, remembering the moment she was told about Finn's death.

"Abuela why are you here? You hate me."

"Oh Santana." Her Abuela took her set next to Santana's bed "I don't hate you. Not anymore, that you made the right choice."

"Excuse me? Right choice about what?"

"Your reaction when that boy died. You reacted like that because he was your lover. You don't react like that over just anyone. I know you we're romantically linked with him."

Santana thought for a moment as she tried to comprehend what her Abuela was saying

"No, no Abuela you've misunderstood. Finn and I weren't anything. I have a girlfriend! I'm a lesbian!"

Her Abuela walked back out the room, disgusted. Santana cried again.

Rachel's POV  
I woke up with a small hand on my face and the sound of soft snores and I smiled as I realised the sleeping figure next to me was my sister Beth. I sat up and brushed the hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. I walked through to find Shelby cooking lunch, I didn't even realise I was hungry until I smelled the food.

"Morning... Well it's afternoon now I suppose. Did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah I did thanks. Beth is still sound asleep."

Shelby laughed, an affectionate giggle "that girl would sleep all day if I let her. Are you hungry?"

Rachel and Shelby sat and ate. "Rachel honey, why don't you tell me what's bothering you? And don't say nothing. You're like an open book."

Rachel sighed "I don't know. It just feels like I'm not supposed to have anyone in my life. Everyone I love is destined to leave."

"Sweetie no! What happened to your Dad was horrible but it happened. And the crash? Well Santana was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and she's going to get better. Heck she loves you!"

"What the fuck would you know?! You've been in my life 5 minutes!" Rachel was shouting now "people have been leaving me my whole life! Friends, my grandparents, heck you walked out on me twice before you decided you actually wanted to get to know me. It probably won't be long until you leave again!"

"Rachel, please. I'm not leaving again."

"Whatever."


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi guys, sorry it's been so long but there's been a lot of family drama and Iable been too upset to write this. But I've written this today, hopefully some nice reviews will cheer me up!**

**oh and school starts again tomorrow, so I hope the next one will be up as soon as possible.**

**disclaimer- I still don't own Glee or any of te characters... **

The next couple of weeks were emotional. Santana recovered but she found out what happened with Rachel at Shelby's and discovered how emotionally scarred she really is. There was also Finn's funeral. That was hard. Carole Hudson collapsing hysterically on top of her son's coffin was enough to cause Santana to cry. All she had left now of that horrible accident was a few cuts and bruises on her face.

Right now Santana and Rachel were sitting in Santana's living room, no one was really talking, they were just enjoying being in each others company. Santana was the first one to break the silence:

"Rachel baby. I think you should go see Shelby."

"Why would I want to go see her?"

"Babe I understand your pissed off but do you at least not want to go see Beth? She adores you Rach."

When she got no answer Santana continued on:

"I know what Shelby done to you was horrible but she's here, trying to fix things. And things were going so well. She was here for you when LeRoy died. That was tough you know most people would have ran away from that but she didn't she's here because she loves you."

Rachel sniffed. She was crying.

"Oh shit Rach I'm sorry." Santana said pulling her into a hug. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"No it's okay Tana." Santana smiled at the nickname "You're right. I've been angry at Shelby for nothing. She's trying to make it up to me and I keep pushing her away. I guess I'm just under the impression that everyone I love is destined to leave me."

The tears were threatening to pour over Santana's eyes as what Rachel said hit her:

"Rachel... Rae look at me. I will never leave you. Ever. I will be here to love you as long as you'll want me. And even after you've asked me to leave, I'll still love you."

"I'll always want you here, please don't ever leave."

Santana pulled Rachel's lips to hers in a crashing kiss. There tongues instantly started fighting for dominance in each others mouth. Santana's hands fisted Rachel's hair whilst Rachel dug her nails into Santana's neck. Rachel leaned forward so she was hovering over Santana with one hand travelling over Santana's body.

Rachel's lips made her way down to Santana's neck. She found a spot and bit down, earning a moan to escape Santana's mouth. She traced the bite mark with her tongue.

Santana flipped them over so she was straddling Rachel's hips. Discarding her tshirt while she was up there. Rachel's tshirt was already off. She leaned down and placed open mouth kisses on Rachel's abdomen. She could already feel the blood pounding between her legs. And slipped out of the shorts she was wearing. Taking Rachel's off with her. She almost came right there seeing Rachel's black lacy thong and matching bra.

Rachel bucked her hips, there core's accidentally bumping into each other. Santana kisses Rachel whilst taking off the thong and then Rachel took Santana's own underwear off. Santana's fingers were dancing there way down to Rachel's heat. They stopped when she found Rachel's swollen clit. Santana and Rachel were still looking into each others eyes. There lips crashed together at the same time as Santana squeezed the swollen nub.

Rachel's back arched at the contact and she let out a shaky breath. She started rubbing and squeezing at a quicker pace. Then Santana's fingers moved down and sat at her entrance. She slowly entered one finger and was stopped by a barrier.

"Rachel honey, this is going to hurt okay? But I'll stop if you want me to."

"No, I trust you."

"I'll take care of you baby."

Santana drove her fingers further, breaking down the barrier that was there. She left her fingers where they were for a few minutes, kissing away the tears that had escaped Rachel's eyes. When she felt Rachel relax again she started moving her fingers. The moans that Rachel was letting out almost made Santana break right there.

As Rachel came hard around Santana's fingers. Santana pulled out after a couple minutes and lay down next to Rachel pulling a blanket over them both. She kissed Rachel's sweaty forehead.

"Are you okay baby?"

"Of course I am Tana. I'm more than okay."

"You do realise I broke your virginity right? You're mines forever."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."


	9. Chapter 9

Santana and Rachel were standing in the middle of Rachel's room talking about their future. Rachel's was set in stone - she was moving to New York to become a broadway star. But Santana's was a little bit more unstable.

"I totally want to go to New York with you ok?"

"And give up your dreams Santana? No baby. That's not happening. I mean yeah sure, it's what you want now. But what happens one day when we're both like 40, and you end up resenting me because I held you back. No way Tana. I won't have you hate me."

"Ray, you _are_ my dreams. I mean yeah sure University of Louisville has been my destined college since I was a kid, but my dreams are nothing without you there."

Rachel pouted. There's was no winning with Santana "and as if I could _ever_ hate you." Santana kissed away Rachel's pout. "Please let me move to New York with you, because I love you. So much."

"Well technically speaking, I couldn't actually stop you from moving to New York because, these United States of America are a free country. But I guess, you could move with Kurt and I. We're moving into his Aunt's apartment. But it's only 2 bedrooms."

"Oh, that's okay. I could totally sleep on the couch." Santana secretly wanted Rachel to suggest they share a room together, and she tried to hide her disappointment with a sad smile.

"Tana, sweetie don't be ridiculous. I wouldn't make you sleep on the sofa. I mean for one, it would be so uncomfortable and two, New York winters get very cold. I definitely need someone to keep me warm at night... And I think you would be perfect." Rachel said with a suggestive wink

Santana could hardly control herself. Rachel winking just done something to her and before Rachel could react, she was up against the wall with Santana's tanned arms on either side of her ears. She kissed Rachel fiercely, instantly running her tongue along Rachel's bottom lip to gain entry - which Rachel allowed.

Rachel pushed Santana to lie on her bed, straddling her hips whilst undoing the button on Santana's jeans. Rachel let out a hiss as Santana's tongue brushed across Rachel's pulse point. Santana then darted her mouth back to Rachel and took her bottom lip in between her teeth. Rachel slid one hand into Santana's pants and down her underwear.

"You're so hot Tana. That's why I need you to keep me warm in New York."

"As much as I'd _love_ to hear about how you two are gonna be keeping each other warm in New York. I must insist that you lock your front door. Any old riff-raff could just walk through."

There in the doorway of Rachel's bedroom, stood the glamorous figure of Shelby Corcoran.

"What the fuck?!" Rachel exploded as she tore herself away from Santana to the other side of the room. "Let yourself in why don't you?!"

"I did." Shelby coughed to cover up her laughter as Santana and Rachel both scrambled around trying to fix there clothing.

"What are you doing here anyway? And where is Beth?" Rachel asked

"She's with Quinn and Puck. I wanted to talk to you."

Rachel led herself and Shelby back downstairs and Santana decided she needed a very cold shower. A freezing one.

"You could have called you know Shelby. It's very rude of you just to show up here."

"If I'd called, would you have answered?" Rachel shook her head no.

"Exactly. So here I am."

**As usual, please review. (Just so you know, if you guys want yous can follow me on twitter Xemmamcaulay)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Guys I am so sorry for the delay! I went on holiday & then I came back and I had a pile of schoolwork to catch up on + I had to address some personal issues. But anyway, here's the next chapter! **

**Disclaimer: sorry for the spelling mistakes, I'm writing this on my iPhone and I swear it has a mind of it's own...**

"Beth has been missing you like crazy."

"No okay?! Don't you dare start playing the Beth card with me ok? You caused this mess Shelby!"

Rachel was right. And Shelby knew it.

_FLASHBACK_

_"So you do understand what you're signing yourself up for right? You're not allowed any contact with the child until she reaches the age of 16." _

_When she'd seen the ad that a 30-year-old gay couple were looking for a surrogate mother with big payouts. 19-year-old Shelby Corcoran jumped at the chance. Being a student in New York City was expensive, and the payout that the Berry's were willing to payout was just the lump sum that Shelby Corcoran needed to jump start her broadway career. She knew she had to give up her child and potentially never see her ever again. _

_"Yeah I totally understand. Carry the baby for 9 months, pop it out, then you guys pay. I know how this works." _

_Hiram Berry just sighed. They were trusting the life of there child - in a child. But Shelby was everything they were looking for. Beautiful, no family medical problems and exceptionally talented, so she had to stay._

_"Exactly, in 9 months time, we could have our baby and you could have a very big bank balance..." _

_END OF FLASHBACK_

"If I could turn back the clock and change things I so would! But I was a child myself Rachel. I was 19 years old! But you must know, there was never a day went past that I never thought about you. And how much I loved you..."

Rachel stared into her Mother's eyes for a long time. She could see it was the truth.

"Okay, I do admit. I was being a tad unreasonable. But my best friend had just died. But I think we should totally start again."

Shelby held out her right hand:

"Hello, I'm Shelby Corcoran. It's great to meet you."

"Rachel Berry." Said Rachel taking the older woman's hand in her own then pulling we into a hug.

Shelby held on for a long as she could, taking in Rachel's smell, how tall she was. She never wanted to let go. And it was right then that Shelby made a promise to herself that she would never let Rachel down again. Ever.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey guys! Next chapters here again! I thought long and hat about who to hook Quinn up with and ngl, I think her and Mike would be so bloody cute together! **

**Oh oh and my sister just had a baby today, so I'm very, very happy! :) **

"Nooo! Dat's not 'ow do it Aunt Q..."

Quinn looked down into the child's eyes. She had the exact same face as she did, except her mouth, that was from her Father. Quinn loved Beth dearly and she was incredibly grateful that Shelby was letting her spend time with Beth. She knelt down so she was eye-level with the toddler.

"Okay, sorry Beth. How do you do it?"

Rachel smiled at the exchange between the two and went over to help Quinn play. Rachel was incredibly protective of Beth, but she appreciated the effort that Quinn was making.

"Hey Beth, why don't we show Aunt Quinn how it's done ok?"

The toddler nodded ferociously whilst Quinn shot Rachel a thankful look. The rest of the play date went well and Quinn and Rachel were now waiting on Santana and Mike to pick them up. Quinn was extremely nervous as this was her first date with Mike.

"Seriously Rach? What if he doesn't like me? I mean come on... I have a kid."

"Oh come on Quinn, Mike would be mad not to like you. Remember? He asked you out! And he knows all about Beth! If it was a problem he wouldn't have asked you. I just find it weird you guys wanted a double date to be your first."

Quinn laughed gently and fixed her hair and make up.

"Would you stop? You look amazing!"

"That's easy for you to say! You look amazing!"

Rachel blushed, but Quinn was telling the truth. Rachel looked amazing. She was wearing a tight mini dress in black and a pair of red kitten heels. Her lips looked perky with bright red lipstick and her hair had been pinned back into a fishtail. Quinn had opted for a floaty white dress with black heels and had her hair hung in loose curls by her side.

"Hey guys you ready?!" Santana hollered as she walked into Rachel's room. "Oh my... Wow! You guys look amazing!"

Rachel walked up to her girlfriend and wrapped her arms around her waist. "Wow yourself. You look beautiful."

Santana was wearing a blue dress that went down to her calves and a pair of black kitten heels. Her hair was pinned to one side and was curly.

"Anyway come on guys! Mike is waiting downstairs."

Quinn automatically got butterflies but tried to disguise it - unsuccessfully.

"Santana! Please will you tell her she has nothing to worry about? She looks amazing and Mike is crazy about her." Rachel stated

"She's right Q. Stop fussing come on..."

Mike and Quinn sat up front because Santana insisted on sitting beside Rachel stating: "I wants me some Berry time, and I's gets whats I wants."

They arrived at the restaurant (not Breadstix, much to Santana's disappointment) it was a Chinese restaurant because someone (Rachel) had let it slip to Mike that Chinese was Quinn's favourite food.

"Hello! My name is Adam and I'll be your server for this evening." He said with a pleasant smile aimed at Rachel. Santana shot a death glare at the waiter.

"What a jerk..."

"Oh relax San, he's just being nice."

"S'long as that's all it is baby."

Quinn and Mike laughed awkwardly, as they were left alone to talk.

"So Quinn... What did you do today?" Mike asked Quinn. His smile coming and going which he always done when he was nervous. Quinn found it absolutely adorable.

"Umm, me and Rach spent the day with Beth. We took her out to the park."

"That's great! Bet that was fun!"

"Oh it was! What did you do?"

"Uh... I just had my dance class this morning, then I went to lunch with my Mom." Mike blushed, another thing Quinn found adorable. Mike dared to look into the blonde girl's eyes and nothing but longing and love in her eyes, both the same things he felt. He wanted to love as to be loved. Sure, he loved Tina. But as a friend, he couldn't ignore the butterflies he got whenever Quinn walked in a room or spoke to him. He dared to give her hand a squeeze and was relieved when she smiled at the gesture.

"Oh my god they are disgustingly cute together. It makes me sick." Santana whispered to the brunette next to her

"What about us? We're _disgustingly cute_. Does that make you sick?" Rachel queried, raising her left eyebrow with a smile. Santana loved it when she done that.

"Of course not. I love us. And I love you."

"And I love you too." They kissed passionately for a sweet moment until the waiter came over with there food, ruining the moment.

"Who ordered the egg noodles?" He said putting the plate right in between the two.

"Are you for real dude?!" Santana snapped at him.

Rachel put a soothing hand on her girlfriends thigh "Tana shh sweetie."

Once they all had there food, they started having a casual conversation, talking about school, the glee club, and Beth.

"And Beth's so smart! I mean she's a little behind musically than I was at her age but that's nothing that canny be fixed. She already knows defying gravity. She's amazing!" Rachel said

"Yep! And she loves playing games!" Quinn said

"And she looks so much like Quinn! Apart from her mouth, that's Puck's. No doubt about it." Santana said matter-of-factly.

"She sounds amazing! Hopefully I can meet her one day!" Mike said, before immediately regretting it. Everyone looked to Quinn who just looked like she was ready to burst with excitement

"Oh my god of course Mike! Beth would totally love you!" Quinn said. Santana and Rachel held in a breath they didn't know they were holding.

The rest of the evening went without a hitch. The waiter took the hint to leave Rachel alone after the non-existant tip Santana left him. Mike gave Quinn a goodnight kiss on the cheek and then drove Santana and Rachel back to Rachel's.

"Seriously. I already think they're gonna get married."

"Calm down Rach. They've only been out on 1 date."

"Yes but I can totally tell these things."

"Oh yeah? And what about us?" Santana asked with a curious look on her face. Rachel straddles her legs as the sat down.

"Well, we're gonna move to New York next year. We'll get married a few years later and we'll have 3 children." Rachel kissed Santana softly.

"That sounds perfect."


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys, I'm sending a giant cyber-hub to everyone who watched the Quarterback episode, and even tho it's not on in the uk until Friday I watched it online. **

**As usual, thank for you guys reviews and stuff, it honestly means a lot... **

Life was quiet. _Too_ quiet. Santana didn't like it because it meant something bad was bound to happen. They'd returned to school and school life was good because they had senior priviledges. Hiram had returned from India and her and Rachel had been together for 9 months.

She was at a 3-hour Cheerios practice and being second-in-command meant it was pretty easy going.

"Come on! Another 15 laps girls you're running like a pregnant lady! And I know what that's like! Come on knees up and run!" Hollered Quinn using her HBIC and turning to look at her bestfriend

"You're thinking waaay to loudly. Spill Lopez"

"What you talking about Q? Ah ok, I was just thinking about life, it's too quiet. I don't like it. Something bad's going to happen..."

Quinn gave a soft laugh and placed her hands on her hips "Just because no one's dying and there's no car crashes, doesn't mean something bad is going to happen you know S. Maybe not this week anyway."

"Oh shut up Q. I just can't shake the feeling. Anyway, enough about me, how are you and the boy Chang doing? We gettin serious yet? Do I need to kick his ass?"

Quinn blushed at the mention of her boyfriend, they'd been together for 2 months and it had been brilliant, she's never been happier. She realised she'd been quiet for too long when she saw her bestfriend smirking at her

"I knew it! You guys are gettin major serious! Aren't you?"

Quinn blushed to the same colour as the red on her Cheerios uniform

"Oh my god I knew it!" Santana's eyes grew wide and Quinn rushed over an place her hand over her bestfriend's mouth. Quinn was glad at that moment that she was taller.

"Okay yes, we're getting serious. We haven't had sex yet, but we have done things..."

Santana laughed, a wicked cackle. "Didn't think the dancing fairy had it in him..."

"Shut up bitch. Or else you'll be running laps with the rest of them."

Santana was glad when Cheerios practice was over as she made her way over to Rachel's house. She still stayed there twice a week even though Hiram was back.

"Tana! I missed you today baby." Santana automatically grew a grin as she kissed her beautiful girlfriend. "I missed you too."

"Hi Santana, how are you?" Hiram asked gently. His tan had been topped up during his time in India, but behind his soft smile, Santana could see tired eyes that still longed for his husband. "I'm great Hiram! Thank you. How are you?"

"Been better."

With that he left the room to go to his bedroom. Rachel told her how he spent so much time there recently, she was worried about him. They lay cuddling on the couch. Santana's head was resting on Rachel's chest, while Santana drew lazy patterns on her girlfriends arm.

"So yeah, I was talking to Quinn today. Her and Mike are getting pretty serious. I think she really likes him."

"Good. I'm glad she's happy she deserves it."

"Yep she sure does, and hey Mike loves Beth and she loves him, so it's totally a bonus."

"I know and it's a good thing because if he said anything about my baby sister, I'd unleash my Berry Bomb and he wouldn't want that."

Santana laughed "a Berry Bomb? Seriously?"

"Oh yeah, I can be a crazy bitch when I have to be, especially when it comes to my baby sister. Or you."

"Good, so what do you wanna do this weekend?"

"Well... Shelby has asked me and you to go camping! She takes this annual camping trip with her family from Akron every year. And I'd really like you to come with me. It's only Friday night and Saturday night. We'll be back Sunday."

"Camping? Uh... Ok" Santana didn't like bugs, she tended to avoid things that were around bugs, like sitting on grass. She doesn't do that.

"Don't worry, if any big bad bugs come, I'll unleash a Berry Bomb on them."

Santana laughed and passionately kissed the girl in front of her. They were interrupted when Hiram cleared his throat behind them.

"Sorry to interrupt, I was just wondering if you guys wanted anything to eat? I was gonna order take-out."

"Breadsticks do deliveries now!" Santana gasped as her eyes widened. Hiram laughed, showing a set of shiny white teeth. "Okay! Breadsticks it is, usual for you Santana?" She nodded and have him the thumbs up "and anything vegan for you Rach?"

"Yup daddy! Thank you!"

An hour later they were all sitting round the table eating, the conversation was casual, school, work, Cheerios, glee. Sectionals were less than a month away.

"Rach, I've been meaning to tell you something." He wipes his mouth and stood up and pulled a letter out a drawer "this came in the mail for you this morning. It's from NYADA."

Rachel's eyes widened while Santana bounced up and down in her seat "open it Rach! You gotta open it!"

Rachel opened the letter and scanned her eyes over the letter. "I have an audition in a months time! Oh my god!" Hiram hugged his daughter tightly and kissed her cheek, Santana have her a kiss on the forehead, and then her hand. "We're both so proud of you sweetheart."

"I can't believe it."

"I can, you're amazing." Santana said Hiram nodded in agreement.

"And what about you Santana? What are you doing?"

"I'm going to study law at NYU."

"Ahh, New York University. Very good Santana. I'm proud of you both. Leroy would be too. I just want you to know Rach, your Dad and I had a college fund set up for you, it's yours when you leave. There's $40,000. We've been saving since you were a baby. And of course Santana, I'd help you put anyway I can, financially that's not a problem."

"Oh that's not needed Hiram. My parents have my own college fund for me. But thank you anyway."

He smiled softly at her, Santana liked that smile. It was so true and made Santana feel like everything was going to be ok. "The offer still stands. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to finish this upstairs and let you girls enjoy the rest of your evening."

"Goodnight Daddy."

"Goodnight Hiram."

"There's something just not right with him..." Rachel said glancing off in the direction her Father just left.


End file.
